“Therefore, in order to keep me from
becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to
torment me. 8 Three times I pleaded
with the Lord to take it away from me. 9 But
he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my
power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will
boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest
on me. 10 That is why, for Christ’s
sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in
difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
This is the verse that has kept me going
this week. The Chaplain on Sunday spoke the words that I needed to hear. (I
LOVE when that happens!!) I have pleaded that God would take away the struggles
that I am going through, or fix them, make them easier, please God, do
something because this is not easy. But, He has not taken them away, He has not
made them easier. But, I was reminded that just because He doesn’t answer my
prayer the WAY that I want Him to answer, does not mean it is not being
answered. He is leaving this thorn in my side for a reason. He is allowing me
to suffer and struggle for a reason. In its own way, that is so incredibly
comforting to me. He (the Chaplain) said that God will answer in three ways,
“Yes, No, or hold on just a little bit longer.” My answer that He has given me
is to hold on just a little bit longer, and I will continue to hold on.
I was also comforted in the reminder that
my future is not in the hands of man. My future is in the hands of God. God
will move through the people that are in charge of my future, and He will move
them how He sees fit. Yes, everyone higher than me may be running this
organization, but God is ultimately giving the orders, whether they know it or not,
it doesn’t matter (thankfully). So why should I worry? God is in control, there
isn’t any other hope or comfort that is better than that. What a relief that
gave, how much joy arose in me because of this Godly reminder. God is in
control.
That is all I have to say for this short
blog. My struggles are the same but they have been brought to the attention of
others who may or may not be able to help me. I have stood up for myself and my
Soldiers. If things change, it’s because God has instructed them to. If things
do not change, it is because has instructed them to stay the same. Either way, God’s instructions to me now are to hold
on just a little bit longer, to not worry, and to know that His grace is
sufficient and His power is made perfect in my weakness. How beautiful is this hard lesson I am
learning.
Father God, thank you. Thank you for this
lesson You are teaching. I love the reminder that You are in control, and that
I am not here by accident. You are the ultimate orchestrator of my life and the
lives of everyone and there isn’t a better musician than You. You have made all
things beautiful, including this lesson and though it has been incredibly
miserable, I do thank You. Please continue to guide me, and usually carry me
through these next few days. Thank you for my mom and her sweet advice to me to
pray to get me through the next hour, and pray again for each hour. I have done
this, and you have not forsaken me. I praise You Lord and thank You. In Your
precious and Holy Name I pray, Amen.
